Saturday, May 22, 2010

The More We're a Merrier We

I am a moderate enthusiast and practicer of the haha.
People harbor pretty strong allegiances for or against hahas, right? I obviously don't use them in my blogging (much) but I sure use them in gchat, in MSN messenger, in Facebook chat and the occasional tweet.
It's a laugh word, yes, some people have actual laughs that actually phonetically sound like haha, so it can be officially used to underline funny things, which I do use it for sometimes. More often I find myself using it as a don't-quote-me-on-this card. Very useful.
Someone texts me, asks me my opinion on something I really know nothing about that should have a strong opinion given towards it/asks me my opinion about something I'm going to get in trouble for telling them what I actually think about it, and all I have to do is insert my good old haha and a period directly after my reply. This simple five-space lifesaver allows me to express exactly how I feel, or exactly how much I don't know, about absolutely anything, no matter how offensive or uninformed I may be.
I know we all know the people who insert the haha SO often that texting or messaging them feels kind of like texting or messaging a dishrag. You become suspicious of their level of brain activity, and begin to think you might actually be communicating with an anemone or a shy toddler because suddenly, everything is a shoulder-shrug and an eye roll and an uncomfortable giggle-and-slink. You ask them who they went to lunch with, and they respond Carl haha. Who is this Carl? Why does Carl inspire laughter? Is Carl a funny person? Is Carl annoying, tiresome, does he always pay for you and you're feeling snarky that you went to lunch with him because you only went because he always
pays for you?

I have a great respect for the singular ha users. The people with very sarcastic senses of humor who are either great pessimists or realists (or occasionally, Eeyores) who insert their single syllable laughter either as an indication of their sense of entire life failure, or, insert it into something that may actually be funny.

Most people I've encountered who are users of the hehe are just creepy. While the hahaers don't actually find everything funny, they're just wishy-washy, the heheers not only find literally EVERYTHING funny, they somehow insert a creepy-funny funniness into the funny. Every single time.
Example: you looked pretty after church today :0D I'm sorry your shoe broke hehe.
What...I....don' feet...thank you?
Even worse is the heh heh, which I won't even go into, because my sample group with that one is just too small.
The hee hee is mischevious, and luckily usually used by people respected enough to be allowed to act like little elves every once in a while for a second. This family of haha is usually shared with a cute link of a puppy, or a glittery heart. 
The hahahahahahahahahahaers are either easily excitable, like puppies, or are those people who're unfortunately and completely hysterical about everything, all the time. The ones who need three hours of sleep and love SWINGING and WATER-SKIING and take great joy in writing epistles about leaves they brushed off their front walks that morning that reminded them of the progression of relationships and seasons in their life.
Or something like that.

I will always proudly pledge my allegiance to the haha, rather than to the hehe or the heh heh or the ha or the hahahahahaha.
Three cheers for us wishy-washy purists.

Did you know Mary Poppins was Dick Van Dyke's second movie ever?


Sarah and Robbie said...

A true "hahaer" at heart, I loved this post. Loved it.

Liesl said...

I'm definitely a "hahaer" (which looks like it needs to be a German word) when it comes to texting and IMing. Oh, us wishy-washy people. We're so eccentric.

HeidiLynn said...

I've always thought the "hehe" was creepy. The creepiest.

Tess said...

This is hilarious.

kaylie jean. said...


(I almost dived into the realm of the "hahahaha"-ers just now, but because of the content that was making me "hahaha," I chose to refrain... even if it did inspire such a reaction from me).

You are really funny. We should play.

brooke said...

personally a fan of the

Anonymous said...

I've found that the guffawing *HAW!* usually expresses best how I am actually laughing. Otherwise, I'm just snickering, and there's no way to spell that & retain your dignity.

Brittany said...

hehe is absolutely terrible.

i'm a haha-er too. i hope you know you are hysterical.

Birrell Family said...

The ha ha's make me think of and miss our Robert :)

Sarah Lynne said...

I suppose I would place myself in the "hahahahaha" category, although I usually express it with simply HAx9, etc. with the number corresponding to how funny I actually believe it to be or just the mood I happen to be in. It's very effective!

Anonymous said...

OMG Julie I love you, this post was so incredibly clever and hilarious.