Friday, June 12, 2009

Ugly Hair

Something very entertaining has been happening lately. I dream from the second I fall asleep until just before I wake up, and I'm not having normal dreams. My brain keeps taking things that have happened to me, then people I've seen, and combining them into really unenviable situations.

Sunday: I see Connie. I see my bishop. On this particular Sunday, I feel like my hair is ugly, and I'm wearing a purple turtleneck I'm not particularly fond of. So I end up having a dream that Connie and my bishop are telling me, repeatedly, in the cultural hall of my church, while they both wear copies of my ugly purple turtleneck, how ugly my hair is.

a random Wednesday: I go to the fabric store. I imagine being wound up in different calicoes, because I quite like a nice, garish calico with a wheat pattern or little people on it. I run into some really random person from high school. My eye rests upon a little white paper with some pink buttons on it that I really fancy. Consequently, in my dream, I'm back at the fabric store, and the person from high school is actually Indian, and good at wrapping saris, and has one of the pink buttons I admired in the middle of their forehead instead of a red dot, and is wrapping me in my very own custom sari and babbling at me in Indian as I dream.

Wednesday: I read Ashlee's blog, I catch up on it, and there's a post about this delicious tart thing that she ate with Kim. I like this tart idea. And the idea that it comes from Costco. I want one. Later, I go over to Dave's to see him home from his mission with Collin, who also just got home, Kristin, and Trevor. We talk to Dave about his mission, and to his big sister, Emily, about her leading role in Beauty and the Beast at the Scera Shell, which she is currently performing in. Night before last, I end up having this crazy, crazy dream where Dave, Kristin, Collin, Trevor, Emily, my Emily, Andy, and assorted other people are at Pizzeria 712 eating none other than ASHLEE'S DELICIOUS TART together, while Beauty and the Beast is kind of going on around us, Dave is still wearing his missionary clothes, so is Collin, and then we all go to Costco together and buy another tart.

Each night they continue to get more and more ridiculous. I was in a wedding last night, and the bride is half Hawaiian, and so there was this traditional dance where the bride's sister danced and everyone threw money at her and tucked it in her clothes. All the money went to the bride and groom. At this wedding, I had a very beautiful bouquet of orange roses all my own, and Andy kept trying to be cute and stick it behind his ear. At this wedding, I was wearing a nude Spanx-type deal undergarment that kept riding up and reminding me it was under my very sheer beautiful white bridesmaid's dress, and so you may or may not speculate that last night, or early this morning, I had a dream in which I was dancing in front of a bunch of people in ONLY the nude Super Attractive biker short-type garment while they tucked money into it. And I had the flowers behind my ear, but they were taped because they were bouquet-sized, not ear-sized.

I don't know what that sounds like to you guys.

10 comments:

Constance Marie said...

Ahahahah that made me laugh really hard. Why would I tell you your hair is ugly? And so repeatedly? And with the bishop?

This made my day.

Lanee said...

First of all I now desperately want pizzeria 417--or whatever number it is-- even though I just stuffed myself full of carbohydrates at Olive Garden. Also I think you may need to seek the help of a professional.

laura marie said...

When I think of nude colored anything, I think of Darcy. I'm glad that both of use were able to wear our little spandex suits in normal colors that did not scare people when they first saw us.

Fashionably Kate said...

That's funny. I remember having CRAZY dreams before I got married. Like my dress would be bright red, or I didn't fit into or, I couldn't find it in time to get married. I'm sure stress played a lot into it.

Thanks for sharing. I needed a giggle. :)

Casey T. said...

Feel glad that your dreams are ludicrus (that's not spelled right). Mine are much more frightening.

jasmine said...

hahahaaha! that's awesome! i love that you dreamed that your bishop was telling you your hair was ugly. that's so random and hilarious! the brain never fails to amaze me.

bulkleybunch said...

you silly girl! you are pretty funny with your demented mind! :)

Matthew said...

I could not interpret those dreams to save my life... but, for the record, at least you weren't being chased by Warwick Davis trying to stab you with a rusty, blunt object! (don't have ANY idea on how that one got into my head).

Birrell Family said...

I'm not going to lie to you. That Apple tart from Ashlee's blog is what the chubby angels eat... they eat a lot of it! It's not even homemade... it's from Costco, imagine that. There is something magical about that dessert with it's scattering of raspberries. Add a scoop of vanilla ice cream and you will see what I'm talking about... heaven!

Lila Tueller said...

Hahah, that is so funny!I love dreams- but thank heavens they are dreams..except for sometimes when you wake upfrom a wonderful one and are sad that your back to real life!! haha. Julie, I really love reading your blog. I do, by the way, read it often. Your just so funny!
Congratulations on the upcoming wedding!

paige tueller